Head Massages. And how (not) to handle them…

So today we’re discussing head massages at the hairdresser. One word. Awkward. There you are, having your hair washed, which is essentially an ablution, and suddenly, without warning…the massage. Sensual. Rythmic. AWKWARD. I mean, what are you supposed to do? Close you eyes and moan softly at the undeniably pleasurable feeling? Carry on scrolling your through your Twitter timeline on your phone thus risking passing judgement on the lack of sensual prowess of the masseuse? Afterwards do you thank her? Offer to take her out to dinner? Mumble, red-faced, as you avoid all eye-contact then pretend it never happened in a ‘what goes on tour stays on tour, let’s never talk of the intimacy that passed between us again’ kind of way? It’s a minefield. Frankly, I want a quick blast of water that’s too hot (but of course when she asks me if the temperature’s ok, I say ‘It’s fine, thank you’), a rough, slightly dismissive wash, and then a brusque towel dry. I do not want sensual. I do not want any confusing, semi-sexual crossover. Basically, I am way too British to fully enjoy a pleasurable head massage on a Saturday morning at the hairdresser. Though the cup of tea afterwards was rather lovely…

5 Responses to Head Massages. And how (not) to handle them…

  1. Edward Plunket says:


    My personal feeling is just go with it. I usually doze off. I pay £35.00 plus a tip twice a year and have such a good relationship with Roy (not that good a relationship!!) that he gives me a ten minute head massage at the end. He is flattered when I start purring as he takes it as a good sign!! I don’t have a cup of tea afterwards but the first cigarette tastes fantastic!!

  2. Argh,this comes under “pampering”, don’t like pampering, don’t like the word (nappy connotations), don’t like the process as the majority define it (doesn’t involve books).

    I just don’t want it. I don’t expect much from my hairdresser, just slightly shorter hair and not to leave weeping. I’d even prefer if they covered up the mirrors. Now this new massage thing, uncomfortable indeed, and in my case normally accompanied by the comment “Ooh haven’t you got a funny shaped skull!”

    It is never something I look forward to.

    K xxx

    • I’m not a big ‘pampering’ fan either Karen. And I agree (and laughed) with your hairdresser requirement check list: slightly shorter hair, no weeping, and minimal inappropriate fondling. Though I am now intrigued by your ‘funny shaped skull’…. x

  3. I was a forceps birth in the 1960′s when they dragged you out with something resembling a JCB – have strange dent in top of my skull, made me a whizz at book balancing deportment lessons :-) xxx

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